Dancing Waters
by SmilingForTheSun
Summary: An AU inspired by the Arabian themed ending-Nagisa spends his days dancing for abusive Rin, the prince of their kingdom, pretending his life is alright, and yearning for his friends. He doesn't know why he was suddenly taken from his town. He doesn't know if he will ever see his friends again. Language, some abuse, YAOI, and lemons. RINxNAGISA
1. Chapter 1

Dancing Waters

The shiny beads draped atop the boy's thick blonde curls tinkled with every subtle movement, mimicking the sound of a wind chime blowing softly in the wind. The sheer silks wrapped around his small hips pulled and loosed as he swayed them from side to side. He danced his way to the edge of the pool, flicking his wrists and pointing his petite feet with every step. The bracelets and jewels that ornamented his slender frame glistened in the Arabian sunlight. He fluttered his painted lashes at the muscled, red haired man in the elaborately tiled palace pool, revealing light pink pearls. He flashed a brief smile in the man's direction. They locked eyes before the boy closed them again, and took his first step into the clear blue water. The man leaned on the opposite end of his oasis, and watched his newest plaything slowly submerge his thin body into the water. He bit his lip seductively, revealing his pointed teeth. He lifted his back off the pool's edge, body burning from arousal and waded towards the blonde, who was now waist deep in the cerulean water. The purple silks that were draped across the boy's hips were left behind, now floating back by the steps of the pool.

"Cold?" the red-head asked the boy when he reached him. He brought a wet hand down on the blonde's barely tanned shoulder.

The boy shivered at the touch. "No, Rin. I'm fine. _" No I'm not._ He attempted to shy away before being pulled into the built arms of the prince of the palace. _Come on, let go._ He wanted nothing more than to be done with this tiresome act._ Please, someone just kill me now_.

"Oh, Nagisa, don't lie to me. You're always lying." Rin lifted the smaller teen's chin up to look at him, but Nagisa's pink orbs strayed off to the side.

The red-head was beginning to lose it, like he always did when the boy stopped complying. Words could not describe how much he desired Nagisa's beautiful, sensitive body. He'd never known of a more sensual male in his life that could carry his small frame so similarly to a woman. _But why does he always look away when I touch him, _Rin wondered angrily. "Why can't you keep up that sexy look in your eyes? What's the problem? You can't stand being this close to me? Is that it?"

Nagisa stayed silent.

Rin slapped the blonde clear across the face. "You damn slut! The only think you're good for is this sexy ass of yours." He grabbed one of the boy's cheeks forcefully before shoving him down into the water, and climbed out of the pool. "Nitori!" he yelled to one of his many servants in the garden-like vicinity. "Towel. Now!"

A skinny, silver haired boy shuffled to the prince and handed him what he wanted. He was blushing wildly at the sight of Rin's naked, perfectly muscled body. You would be blind if you couldn't notice the undying lust in the young servant's hungry blue eyes. The prince just smirked in amusement, "At least _you_ listen to me." He glanced over once more at the drooping shoulders of the teen in his pool, rolled his eyes, and started out of the immaculate courtyard. "I'll see you in my room tonight," he growled, and strode towards the exit. He stopped briefly to call for Nitori again.

"Yes, your highness?" the boy asked nervously.

Rin grinned slyly, "You'll join us in my room as well," causing his servant's skin to go from pink, to red, to purple, to blue in a fraction of a second. The prince disappeared past the large beige doors of the palace and motioned for the rest of his elaborately dressed servants to follow.

Nagisa stayed in the shimmering blue for a good while, head down so his eyes were covered, and waited until the rest of the servants soundlessly exited the courtyard. When the doors shut, he allowed the tears that were welled up in his eyes to pour out. He lifted his head to the sun with closed eyes, felt his tears gently trail down his face, and smiled into the brightness. He never allowed himself to cry. Only when he was completely and utterly alone, did he give his body permission to take over. In the little time he would have to himself in the pool, he cried away all his worries and sorrows; before he would have to pretend again, like he always did. He deceived himself for a meager moment that his dirty body was somehow cleansed from the many sins he'd committed. He imagined a time when he was with his dearest friends, swimming away in an oasis, having the time of his life, before he was taken from his town and sold to the rulers of their Arabian kingdom. He missed the odd and strangely funny personality of his friend Haru and all the times he caught him mumbling about how much he wanted to have sex with a pool. He wanted more than anything else to listen to his glasses-clad friend Rei ramble on about mathematical formulas and how he could make his swimming more beautiful. He missed his parents, his dear sisters, and the genuine and protective nature of Makoto. He dreamt that he was in the warm, consoling arms of his brunette friend. His tears, now darkened by running mascara, seemed to flow out endlessly.

Where were his friends now? What were they doing? _Have they already forgotten me?_ He smiled wider and stretched his arms out to the sun. He realized he enjoyed the thought of his friends forgetting about him, because then, they wouldn't have to ever look down upon his dirty body. He accepted the fact that he would probably never see them again. He glowed with satisfaction, because his hectic world suddenly slowed to a peaceful rhythm.

Nagisa twirled his arms above his head, and danced around the pool. He leaped and spun slowly with arms flailing gracefully about, like he was aiming to please some greater being in the sky - to be carried away into the clouds. It almost looked as if the water had taken on a humanly form, and was dancing beautifully along with him.

* * *

**Author note: This is my first fanfiction so I hope the first chapter didn't suck **_**too**_** bad. Yes, it's kind of shallow and very intro-y, but that's only the first chapter. I'm **_**setting the mood**_**, if you will. There WILL be RinxNagisaxNitori action in the next chapter or two. I don't know how explicit yet.  
**

**I don't favor any pairings in particular (I like them all!) and I'm not trying to hate on Rin by making him a "bad" guy. I actually like him a lot but for the purpose of this fic, he's a little rough. Expect some (maybe) INTENSE lemons and abuse in the future.  
**

**I'd really appreciate some reviews. Any ideas would help a lot :)  
**


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

**Author note: This gets pretty dark and a little explicit so . . . if it's not really your thing, don't read. **

* * *

"Hold still, okay? I'll be done soon." Nagisa flinched when the tip of the brown eye pencil grazed the edge of his eye.

"Ah, I'm so sorry!" The red haired princess pulled her hand back quickly, bracelets jingling at the movement, and hugged her body tight like she was shielding her chest from a perverted boy. "Nagisa I really didn't mean to! I just want the look to be perfect, you know . . ." She stopped suddenly, and her eyes seemed to accumulate a glossy wetness, like she was going to cry. ". . . Because my brother won't accept anything shy of perfection."

He looked away. He didn't want to have anything to do with Rin. He imagined Gou must be so ashamed of herself, having an abusive, perverted, _terrifying_ brother like him. Nagisa was truly afraid of what was going to happen to him tonight. _Not, again._ _No, I don't want it. And Nitori too . . . wait. No . . . Nitori likes it for some reason. _

As much as he wished he could, as much as he wanted to right now, Nagisa vowed to himself that he wouldn't cry. That was the deal he made. Not unless he was alone.

He glanced at Gou, Rin's beautiful, cultured sister. He couldn't shake off how similar they both looked to one another. The siblings were picture perfect. Although Gou had a slim frame with no prominent curves, her subtle features never failed to turn heads. Her ecstatic disposition made her all the more desirable. They had the same hypnotic, deep red eyes that so often trapped him in their gaze. The only difference was that Gou's was caring and full of love, while Rin's showed nothing of the sort.

At times, he would look down on the boy as if he was a large, chocolate cake sitting atop a shining platter. And at others, his eyes would be shaded in a horrifying darkness. It was almost as if whatever human qualities he once possessed were instantaneously drained away and all that remained was an unidentifiable creature from the depths of hell. His sanity seeped down his body in vigorous black waterfalls that pooled at his feet until an entire room was filled, and thrashed the poor blonde boy in its unforgiving torrents. The boy survived the tsunamis with an overwhelming amount of wounds that forever tainted and scarred his body.

The first time Rin's true self was revealed to Nagisa, he was left in a demented state. Although the experience may have started out as traumatizing, it slowly morphed into something much worse. Nagisa was introduced to a kind of darkness he never knew existed. He was reminded of the way the red haired man stared down at him angrily like he had just murdered his mother, how he pulled at the blonde's thick locks until they nearly ripped off his scalp, and slammed him down on the bed. There was still a bruise on the back of his head from when he collided with the sharp edge of the bed frame. He could still feel Rin's sadistic hands forcing his skinny legs apart and smirking hysterically at the sight. He forced himself into the boy's underside and tore through the tight skin until blood seeped across the crisp white sheets, staining them in a dark crimson.

After Rin filled Nagisa with a warm white liquid, after he beat him until his body was covered in tender wounds, after the man revealed every sick part of his being to him . . . after the darkness slowly receded and the light returned to his eyes . . . that was when the black waters evaporated into thin air. He would stare at the shivering, distraught young boy on his floor, how he clutched at his bleeding body, cried out the pink in his eyes, and mumbled undecipherable nonsense, occasionally coughing out bloody phlegm. Rin would cover his mouth, pull at his hair, and pace around before exiting the room in a frantic mess.

"Why does he do that?"

Nagisa froze, realizing his thoughts spewed out of his mouth unconsciously. Gou was staring at him, head tilted to the side in a confused manner. "Why does who do what?" she asked.

The made-up boy shook his head violently and waved his hands in front of his face, "No, it's nothing! I was just thinking out loud. Sorry, Gou-chan."

"It's fine, don't worry about it," she smiled, "I was just wondering why you got so quiet for a while. Well . . . it's because of my brother, isn't it?"

Nagisa was about to reject her proposal when she continued, "No, don't deny it. He's sick, isn't he? I can't even . . ." The tears returned in her eyes and actually seeped over the sides this time. "I can't believe I'm his sister . . . that I'm related to that demented bastard. He was never like this before! He's such a kind, and caring person deep down-"

Nagisa choked on his saliva.

Gou stared at him stupidly, tears and mascara running down her face. "I'm not lying to you! He wasn't always like this. He ISN'T, that's the thing. I don't know what comes over him sometimes . . ."

"IT DOESN'T MATTER!" Nagisa covered his mouth when he realized how loud he was. "No , Gou-chan I'm so sorry!"

The girl shook her head. "Nagisa, baby, its fine. I can't even imagine what he's done to you." She put a cap on the tube of lipstick in her hand and set it on the vanity behind her. She wiped her face with a blue and white, intricately embroidered handkerchief and lazily tossed it to the floor. Nagisa watched as she reapplied mascara and brushed her long red hair. She plucked a pair of shiny, emerald green raindrop-shaped earrings out of a small brown box. He felt her brush his hair to the side and insert the dangly earrings into his earlobes.

"Stand up." He obeyed.

"Gou-chan . . ." he mumbled shyly, "Are you sad about what I said befo-"

"Nagisa! Stop it! Please. I'm worried about you! You smile and act like everything's okay, but it's not! It's always Gou-chan this, Gou-chan that, 'you're so beautiful Gou-chan!' Just stop it. Cry! Let out your feelings! Stop acting like you're this shallow, happy little boy. Just . . . ugh." She grabbed a satin robe from within her walk-in closet and wrapped it around his naked body. She grabbed both sides of his face, pulling him in close to hers, and whispered, "I'll be here whenever you get back. Just waltz right in and wake me up, 'kay?" She smiled. This time, he returned it.

"Well," she started as she dragged him out of her room, "time to tame the beast, I suppose."

Her door took them outside. The enclosed area was another courtyard similar to the one with the pool, enclosed by four walls of the palace. They tiptoed along a cobblestone walkway that bordered the edges of the elaborate rose garden and made their way to Rin's bedroom on the other side of the yard.

Nagisa gazed up at the stars above, and watched as they twinkled down at him. He reached his free arm upwards, maybe to reach one of them . . .

"Nagisa! Your robe!"

"Huh?" He whipped his head around. There, a few paces behind him, lay his satin garment.

He looked back at Gou. She looked at him. They turned to the robe, then back at each other.

"You kind of dropped something," she nodded at the lump of cloth.

"I know Gou-chan. I'm so sorry." He grinned at her and whispered slyly, "I'm really not."

She grabbed the robe off the ground and wrapped it around him again. "You are . . . goodness, you're such a boy."

"Of course I am Gou-chan! I like girls. I'm not like your brother."

"I know, I know."

They were now in front of the large doors of Rin's bedroom. Nagisa could feel goose bumps spreading across his shivering body. He reached for the handle.

"See you, Nagisa."

He glanced once more at the beautiful, red haired princess standing behind him. Worry had crept back into her eyes. _See you, Gou-chan_.

He stepped into the room and closed the door.

* * *

The room was lit only by dim candlelight. It was larger than Gou's but not so elaborately furnished. The bed was grand and covered in a rainbow of embroidered pillows. Gold and white sheets draped over the surface and down the sides. Nagisa took a step back when he saw, no, _heard_ the two people at the edge of the bed.

Wet, muffled noises escaped the mouth of a silver haired boy on his knees between Rin's parted thighs. He was propped up on his elbows and forearms, head thrown backwards and breathing heavily. He sat up slightly to stroke the hair of the boy whose mouth was filled to its full extent. He bobbed his head on the prince's long erection and sucked at it diligently. He pulled back at the touch of his master's hand on his head, smiling brightly into his eyes. His lips were coated heavily in saliva and it dripped down his chin. He went right back to work, flicking his tongue on the tip for a moment, then opening his mouth wide to take in Rin's entire length.

Nagisa was ready to hurl. _My god . . . he's happy. Doing such a thing . . ._

Rin continued stroking the boys, silvery hair. "Yes, Nitori, just like that." The seductive voice that escaped his lips caused Nagisa to tense up, and Nitori to suck harder. He raised his gaze to the front of the room, where Nagisa stood staring disgustedly. "Calm down. You'll be doing this sometime soon too, you know."

Nagisa saw Nitori look up at him with a jealous look in his eyes. Rin grabbed the boys head and forced him back down on his erection. "I didn't tell you to stop, did I?" he barked angrily. Nitori just shook his head and continued.

"Now, Nagisa, come here," Rin ordered.

The blonde gulped and obeyed, making his way cautiously to the edge of the bed. He swayed his hips wide, forced down his fear and replaced it with a sensual, laid back look. _It's what Rin wants._ Rin grinned as Nagisa neared him. "Open that mouth of yours. Come on." He placed a thumb on the boy's lower lip and pulled down. His tongue forced its way in quickly.

"Yes, you two will do just fine tonight," he smirked as he undid the button on Nagisa's robe and watched it fall to ground at his feet.

* * *

**Author note: Sorry for the wait. I decided to scratch my plan to have the other Iwatobi boys in the story. They'll be talked about and seen later on, but not much. I HAVE A DEFINITE STORY NOW and I know where this is going to go. I'll try to write faster! **

**Anyways, the next chapter will be a saucy one . . . **


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

**Author's note: Don't read this if you're uncomfortable with 3somes.  
**

* * *

"Nitori. Enough."

The boy looked up at his master with pleading eyes, maybe to convince him to allow him to keep going. No part of him wanted to stop pleasuring the man he so desperately loved. He pouted his wet lips and prayed that Rin would push his head back down onto the space between his legs that was throbbing with such a mad desire for release. Nitori felt as if someone had stabbed at his heart with a stick, a rough, splintery stake that was twisted around until the pink organ contorted and deformed into a mess of undefinable substance. He knew that Rin had lost his desire for his mouth, that all that was running through his mind was releasing himself into the ass of the thin boy at his right.

The silver haired servant looked up at the boy, Nagisa, and watched him pretend to enjoy the fact that he was now completely naked, that he was dancing for the prince, and lusted for like he was the sweetest candy. _Can't you see? He doesn't want anything to do with you. Why can't you look at me, Rin? What can I do to make you notice me?_

The prince pushed at Nitori's shoulder, "Come on. Move over."

Nagisa watched as Rin's servant froze with terror, how he gradually shrunk into a ball the size of a grape, and crawled on to the bed. He wiped at a tear directly above a lone brown freckle and buried his face in the sheets. He didn't make another noise.

"What a bitch. All he wants is my dick in his ass." Rin slapped his servant's behind and laughed when he cried out. "What, did that turn you on? You're a damn slut, Nitori. You can watch me fuck Nagisa tonight. Get off on that if you want."

Nagisa cringed at Rin's words. He slumped his shoulders and hugged his body that was now shivering from the chilly air of the room. He could feel his skin begin to shrivel up and form tiny bumps along his body, like condensation on a clear glass of water. _I don't want to do this again. I don't want Rin to hurt me again._ He covered his ears, jammed his eyes shut, and submerged his brain into a war against reality. It was good against bad, dark against light, water against fire, yin against yang. He couldn't find the light. No matter how hard he looked, no matter how loud he screamed, no matter how frantically he ran through the darkness in his head, all he could do was tumble around aimlessly and plummet farther and farther into the black, never ending abyss.

_I thought I was fine. I thought I would fight through this, Gou-chan! I wish you were here. How is it possible that you, you and your beautiful kindness, came from the same place as this demon before me? Gou-chan . . . I'm not alright, and I never will be. I can't get through this. Haru-chan? Mako-chan? Rei-chan? Can you hear me? Can you see me? I wish you could. I wish you could see where I am right now. I wish you could see that I'm no longer the happy, naïve little boy I used to be. There's nothing left of him. You wouldn't recognize me. I'm much too skinny, much too bruised and scarred. I don't even think my eyes are the same as before. They're just cloudy grey mush. _

_What color were they? Pink? I can hardly remember now . . ._

"What the fuck do you think you're doing?"

And with that, the war ended. There would be no light. Nagisa's eyes jerked open. He couldn't sense the space around him. _Where's the floor?_ His knees unlocked from their standing position and he stumbled back, still unsure of what was going on. _Wait, am I falling? I can't be._ A strong arm snaked around his waist before he realized he really was about to meet the hard surface. He grabbed at the muscled arm and held on tightly, like he would die if he let go.

"No, please don't let go!" Nagisa cried out without thinking, continuing to struggle to remember where he was and what he was doing.

Whoever's arms he was in, whoever's hard chest he was nuzzling his face against, that person wouldn't make a sound. Nagisa pushed his nose into the person's neck, rubbed it around and drank in their sweet, sweaty scent.

"You smell so good. I could stay in your arms forever. Please, I . . . I have nowhere else to go. You can save me, can't you? From that man? That cruel man with the blood red eyes and those sharp, pointed teeth . . . he hurts me. He," Nagisa glanced upwards lazily. He met a face, a confused face, almost startled, like they were disturbed and troubled and unsure what to do with themselves. Maybe that's why it took a few seconds for Nagisa to realize the person had the same red eyes of the man he talked about. Rin never made a face like that.

Nagisa's face distorted in repulsion. He looked past broad shoulders to see a silver haired boy on a bed with bloodshot eyes and a wet face. He too, seemed as if something was greatly disrupting the natural rhythm in his life. _Nitori . . ._ _and Rin. Oh my god, what am I doing?_

He looked up to Rin again. He wanted to freak out, to push away, to pry off Rin's arms and punish himself for acting the way he did after his strange episode, but for some reason he couldn't. There was no need. Rin was . . . he wasn't doing anything. Just standing there staring down at Nagisa. _Is that really him? _

There were so few times Nagisa witnessed such a bewildered expression on the prince's usually hostile face. Only after he was abused and beaten, did Rin reveal such emotion. The small number of times it happened always left Nagisa in a strange state, unsure what to think. He would lie in his chamber, writhe around on the rug, and prod at his chin with a finger until he was ready to blow his brains out. He would think, _maybe he feels bad? Maybe he regrets the things he does. Didn't momma always tell me to see the best in everyone? No . . . no that's dumb. But why not? Split personality? It's possible . . . but, ugh, I just don't understand. Whatever it is, I know I hate him! _And he would battle with his thoughts like that for the rest of the night.

For that reason, for that slim chance that maybe Rin really DID feel bad for what he did, that he could eventually become good like Gou always said he was, Nagisa stayed put; frozen in the prince's arms. He didn't know how long their eyes were locked onto one another's, but it seemed to drag on for eternity.

Nagisa gently leaned back into the arms in an attempt to push himself out without disturbing Rin any more than he already was, but the moment he did so, the prince snapped back to consciousness. He wrapped his arms around Nagisa tighter than before and pulled him back into his chest.

"Where did you think you were going to go, huh?" He whispered into the blonde's ear. He trailed his tongue around the rim and tugged at the emerald earring on his lobe.

Nagisa tensed up and closed his eyes. _No, I was wrong. He's going to be like this again. _He forced his face away from Rin's mouth, and pushed against his chest in an effort to free himself. "Please, Rin! Stop it! Let go. I don't want this!"

Rin smirked, "You're contracting yourself, my love. What did you tell me just a few moments ago? 'I could stay in your arms forever!'"

"No! I wasn't thinking! I wasn't with my head, I was . . . I was-"

Rin breathed into the boy's ear once again, "Baby, I like when you play hard to get like that. Do you realize how sexy that is?" Nagisa stared at Rin in horror. "Do you realize how delectable you look when you gaze up at me with those pleading eyes of yours? Or how turned on I get when you wriggle your small body against mine like you are now? You can feel it, can't you?" He pushed his hips into Nagisa's slightly rounded stomach.

Nagisa closed his eyes and pushed his head into Rin's chest. He shook his head_, no, there's nothing there. There's absolutely nothing there. Nothing at all . . ._ _who am I kidding? Of course I can._ _It's too big not to feel._

"Rin . . ." Nagisa's voice cracked, "Please, stop it." The tears were beginning to build up.

"No, I don't think I will. I haven't fucked you yet, have I?"

Nagisa's body began to shake. "Please . . ." his voice almost inaudible now.

"Please what?" He lifted the boy off the ground and layed him back on his bed. Nagisa turned on his side and covered his face, but Rin just pushed him back. "I can't see your body that way." He forced the boy's legs apart and pinned his arms to the side. "Yes, just like that," he smiled.

"Rin!" the blonde almost yelled, "Gou-chan says you aren't really like this!"

The prince froze.

"She says you're actually really nice and you feel bad when you do mean things like this! I want to believe her. I want to believe you aren't actually like this. I-"

Nagisa's slowly touched a finger to his cheek; the place Rin just slapped him. It stung. A tear dribbled out his eye and fell to the bed.

"You shut your damn mouth!" Rin shouted. "Don't listen to ANYTHING that bitch tells you! It's all lies!"

"But-" He was slapped once again.

"Fuck you! Fuck everyone! Nitori!" he turned to the other boy on the bed, who sprang up almost instantly.

"Yes Rin!"

"Strip."

The servant didn't even stop to think. He followed Rin's orders with a smile radiating sunlight.

Rin focused his attention back to the boy beneath him. "See? Why can't you be like him? Does he care that I'm rough? No. Does he question me? Never. And what do you do? This!"

Nagisa just stared up at him, unmoving. He was beginning to lose his will to care anymore. _Because I hate you, that's why._

"Fuck. You're going to be like this again? You're going to get all passive? FUCK YOU!" He punched the blonde's already beaten face. His voice quieted, "Nitori. Just wait a bit. I'll be with you in a minute, alright?"

Nitori beamed at him, "Yes, Rin."

Rin's sharp teeth bit into the vanilla skin of Nagisa's neck. The boy responded by crying out in pain. Rin snickered, "How cute." He licked up the blood that began to trickle out of the open wound. He continued by trailing his tongue down Nagisa's neck to his chest. He brought it across a nonexistent breast and bit at the nipple.

The boy whimpered softly. "Stop. Please." He didn't like what Rin was doing. He never did anything like this. He always went right to the sex. Not once did he care to prepare him. This was . . . strange. _Why does this feel kind of . . . no, Nagisa stop it. It's disgusting. It doesn't feel good. But didn't momma say to never lie to yourself? NO! It doesn't matter what she said! I'm not turned on, I'm not turned on, I'm not- _Rin's tongue was flicking rapidly against the tip of his nipple. It began to grow from arousal. _No, no, no! Go back down! Don't get hard! What are you doing! But it's going so fast and it's so wet and it's . . . it feels so good. _

Rin glazed Nagisa's nipples in his saliva until they glistened in the soft candlelight of the room. He gave each one one last lick before leaning back to admire the boy who was trembling and spreading his legs beneath him.

Nagisa opened his eyes, wondering why his pleasure had stopped. His eyes met Rin's. He couldn't hold his gaze and turned his head to the side, embarrassed that he was enjoying what was being done to him. _I'm sick. This is disgusting. I hate Rin . . . _

Rin smiled, flashing his sharp teeth, "You're so damn cute when you're horny. Holy fuck. Why haven't I been doing this from the start?" He shook his head, "Shit, Nagisa. You're just like a woman. Those eyelashes, these hips, your legs . . . spread them like you just where. Let me fuck you without you just laying there for once."

Nagisa wasn't sure what to think. _Is he playing with me? If I do what he says, won't he just hurt me like always? And if I don't, no, I don't want to think about it. I'll just . . . I'd much rather this than be beaten again._ He dropped his legs to the sides.

Rin grinned. "Nitori. Come here."

Nagisa froze. _No. No. No. What? No way._ He threw his eyes to the left and watched as Nitori crawled towards them, ass high in the air, with eyes opened wide; _just the way Rin likes it_.

"Blow him."

Once again, Nitori did exactly as his master asked, and covered Nagisa's erection with his mouth, moaning when the small length was completely submerged. Nagisa was too stunned to do anything. He turned into a solid block of ice. He flicked his eyes to Rin, who was smirking and staring at the ordeal while rubbing at his own erection.

"Rin! What . . . I don't understand, I- didn't you just? No I don't get it. Nitori please stop it! Rin I'm confused!" He could barely get the words out.

Rin's body was beginning to glisten with sweat. He gritted his teeth, "Didn't I tell you that Nitori would be joining us? I said it earlier, didn't I? Chill out okay? Just focus on your dick. Nitori's a pro at this kind of stuff."

Nagisa glanced between his legs. Nitori was smiling at him. How he was doing it, with such a thing in his mouth, the blonde had no idea. _And I mean . . . It doesn't . . . feel bad . . ._

He took it with pleasure, no matter how strange the situation had escalated. At least this way he wouldn't get beaten again. He spread his legs wider and rewarded Rin with exactly what he wanted. He drowned himself in the wet slurping of a mouth on his dick and pushed his hips upwards in sync with Nitori's deep thrusts. He arched his back and let out tiny breaths, imagining it was a girl between his legs. He grabbed Nitori's head and copied what Rin was doing before. _It feels so . . . good._

"No, Nagisa, don't do that." Nitori warned.

"Huh?" Nagisa barely breathed out. "How come? I'm almost . . . I'm about to-"

Then Rin was above them, slapping Nitori to the side. He grabbed Nagisa's cock hard so he wouldn't be able to climax. "Who the fuck do you think you are? Are you me? Are you a man? No, you're a bitch! You take it like a damn woman. Don't pleasure yourself like a man! Like you're me! Shit . . . Nitori, hold his arms above his head. I'm going to fuck him now." Nitori wiped his mouth and did as he was told.

Nagisa pleaded, "No Rin, I'm sorry! I'm so sorry I didn't mean-"

"THE HELL YOU DIDN'T MEAN TO!" Rin's fist came crashing down on Nagisa's stomach. The boy let out an excruciating cry and doubled over as much as he could in his lengthened position. That pain, that darkness he was so incredibly terrified of, gradually seeped back to its rightful place in his mind. He took three more blows, crying out harder each time. _I'm sorry Gou-chan_, he thought through the tears, _I'm so sorry you have to hear this._

Rin ran a hand through his red hair and tossed his head back to get his bangs out of his eyes. He lifted Nagisa's rear and lowered his lips to the hole. He playfully flicked his tongue on the entrance like he did with the boy's nipples. _How does this . . . no, it feels good too. _Rin responded to Nagisa's whimpers by placing his thumbs on either side of the entrance and pulling it apart, slipping his tongue inside.

"Ah! Rin! Please, it's- It feels so good!" Nagisa moaned.

Rin and Nitori exchanged startled glances. "Holy shit," Rin said as he pulled his tongue out.

Nagisa wasn't even going to deny it anymore. He wanted it more than anything. He knew that he would regret this later, but now, none of that mattered. It didn't matter that he was a boy who wanted another boy inside his ass. He was too horny to even think straight. _I just need to come._

He glanced down at Rin with wide, pleading eyes, knowing full well what it would do to him. "Nitori," he whispered up the servant. "Can you let go of my arms?" Nitori lifted an eyebrow at his master. Rin frowned, raising his eyebrows in a look of uncertainty and shrugged his shoulders. Nitori loosened his grasp on the blonde's thin wrists and sat back. Nagisa reached his hands down before he could object himself and grabbed his ass cheeks. He pulled them apart at the hole and faintly uttered, "Enter me, please."

Rin raised his throbbing cock to Nagisa's hole and nodded, mystified at Nagisa's submissive words. He couldn't tell if the boy was keeping up some sort of façade, so he could get over this quickly and be done with it, but he almost couldn't care. If this was only an act, he'd punish him as soon as Nagisa lost the need in his eyes, and he'd do the same as he always did.

"Don't you dare cry." And Rin pushed his tip into the opening. He was sucked right in. He grabbed beneath Nagisa's thighs and thrusted in hard, filling his ass to its entirety. To his disbelief, Nagisa didn't cry out- not in pain that is. The boy's sweet voice caressed Rin's body, cleansing him with the pureness of the sound. He pulled back slowly, feeling every part of the hole on his way out. His eardrums were drowned in the wet noises that escaped Nagisa's ass as he was sucked in an out.

Rin never fucked slowly, never. And he was liking it. He wanted more. He wanted Nagisa to moan louder, longer, and to cry out his name.

"Nitori," Rin called for his servant through thrusts. "Sit down on him. Get in front of me and fuck his cock."

Nitori crawled around and lifted his leg to straddle Nagisa. He layed down briefly, bringing his face incredibly close to Nagisa's and waited for Rin to prepare him by inserting a finger in his ass. The smaller boys made embarrassed glances into each other's eyes and waited for Rin to finish with Nitori.

"Okay, get to it. I'm going to come soon."

Nitori sat up and spread his ass. He lowered himself down on Nagisa with ease. It was much smaller than what he usually took, but he rocked on it like he would to Rin.

Rin whispered against Nitori's back, "Bounce on it baby. Let me see it." The silver haired servant complied, throwing Rin off the edge at the sight and thrusted harder into Nagisa.

At this point, Nagisa was overflowing with sensations, feelings he never knew existed. He was rocking his hips upwards to meet the thrusts of the two males above him, one in his ass, one on his cock, and he gripped the sheets at his sides. He moaned out Rin and Nitori's names when he finished, releasing himself into the boy above him. Nitori did the same, dotting Nagisa's stomach in white. Rin was last, and with one final thrust into the slim blonde, filled the boy's hole with his seed.

Rin fell back on the bed, and wiped the sweat on his brow. His hair was damp and in need of a bath. He smiled at the sight of his servant sprawled out on his dancer, both of them clutching at one another and recovering from their orgasms.

He eased himself up, draped a robe about his shoulders and made for the door. "You two were absolutely wonderful. Until next time, my loves." With one last glimpse back at the hazy, drained faces of the two overworked boys on his bed, ivory seeping out from their undersides, he slammed the door.

* * *

**Well, I'm glad i finally got that out! **

**Chapter 4 will be out much faster. Life kind of happened . . . unfortunately.**


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

The open windows invited the sounds of the night to gently salivate into the room. The hooting of an owl and the gusts of the cold desert winds kissed the skins of the two boys left alone. The sweat on their bodies, now cold, provoked the infamous little bumps to sprout up along their thin frames. Their heart rates had finally slowed to their natural rhythms. The boy with silver hair made circles with his finger on the arm of the blonde beneath him, who was rubbing a section of the sheets between his thumb and index. Neither could look at the other. They'd never spoken a word before that night. They occupied completely different roles in the palace, and probably never would have met if it weren't for the prince's perverted attraction to them. It was awkward, neither knowing what to say, who should break the silence. They were in desperate need of a bath.

Nagisa worked up the courage to break the peace, "Um . . . Nitori?"

"Uh, yes . . . Nagisa?"

"How long have you, you know, been serving Rin like this?"

"Just a year . . ."

The blonde hesitated. "And . . . has it ever been the same as today? You know, with an extra person?"

Nitori shook his head against Nagisa's chest. "Nope, not once."

The wind stirred and the boys' conversation stilled. Heavily embellished curtains blew this way and that, inducing the various trinkets atop an end table to spill and topple to the floor in a chorus of tinkling chimes. The candlelight flickered, almost blowing out. The inconsistent, ever wavering glow conducted shadows to grow and recede throughout the room in an odd sort of orchestra. A parakeet flapped a wing, let out a high pitched chirp, then fell back to sleep inside its cage.

These varying disturbances transfixed the boys' attentions. Their tension was delicate. How could the situation grow more troublesome? They were one on top of the other, undersides filled with semen. Their youthful faces, nervous and uncomfortable, were remarkably close. The blonde couldn't even get mad at himself for the way he acted that night, at least not yet. All that was flooding his mind was an image of the space between the servant boy's legs that he, Nagisa Hazuki, tainted on his own.

_No, that's so bad. It's so wrong . . . what have I done? _A tear trickled down his stinging cheek. _Oh dear lord, whoever's up there in the sky, what have I become? Forgive me. Forgive me, Nitori. _His heart ached. He knew it was all because of Rin, that the menacing, sick, devilishly attractive prince was the reason he was molding into a completely different person- a person to pity.

Nagisa released the section of sheets he had held captive between his two fingers and raised his hand to Nitori's head. He hesitantly lowered it to the soft, shimmering hair of the servant and stroked the silky strands. He felt the body above him tense up at his touch, but continued to brush the hair with tender fingers. _He can't feel good about this either. He loves Rin, but he had to do something like that to me._

Nitori's voice faltered, ". . . Nagisa? Uh, I don't . . . what are you doing exactly?" He raised his head up so their noses were almost touching. They stayed there staring into each other's eyes, blue into pink, unsure where to go from there. They watched each other's cheeks grow warm and bloom the color of cherry blossoms.

Nagisa dropped his arm to the side. "I'm sorry, Nitori . . . I just, I know you can't feel too good about this either. And I did such a thing inside-"

The servant hushed the blonde's mouth with a finger. "It's okay, Nagisa. It's what Rin wanted. I couldn't object. You know, he used to hurt me too. I was just like you, but then I fell in love with him . . ." his voice trailed off.

Nagisa scrunched his face up, but it instantly softened. _Nitori is such a sweet person._ "But . . . how? How can you love someone so cruel?"

Nitori shook his head, "Because he really isn't. Well, he always is to me. I guess it's because I'm annoying," he laughed, "but there have been times when I've found him completely lost in his thoughts: playing with his food or gazing out a window or smirking at some joke that randomly popped up in his head, and it's simply captivating. When he bathes, gently lathering his big, muscular body in soap . . . and rinsing himself off . . . how he revels in the pool water and swims around in it for hours on end until his hands and feet become prunes. Or! When I catch a glint in his eye right before he's about to take on a challenge, and the way he smiles down so warmly at his sister's smiling face- its all so lovely. Don't listen to what he says about her. His love for her is almost incestuous."

_In . . . cestuous? _

"Nagisa," Nitori continued, "trust me when I tell you this, but Rin truly is a beautiful person."

The blonde shut his eyes. He felt a little insulted. "No, Nitori, I hate him. He's terrible. He's sick! Look at my face! Look at my scars! He's, he's . . . I don't know. I just hate him . . . so much."

Nitori smiled, "It's okay. Hate him all you want, alright? Just try and understand him-"

"Understand what!" Nagisa shrieked, sending saliva out of his mouth and landing on Nitori's face. "No . . . Nitori, this isn't me. I'm sorry." He wiped the servant's stunned face with the bed sheet and covered his eyes. "I just don't know what to do anymore," he began to cry. "My life had been chaos since I came here. Nothing makes any sense! Why am I here? What's the use? Why am I even alive anymore? I want to die. I want to die, Nitori. Can you believe it? I was so happy before. My life was innocent and rich and fun and . . . now it's nothing! It's terrifying! I don't want to do this again. I don't want Rin to have sex with me again. And how did I . . . I practically asked him for it!" His sobbing eventually muddled his speech.

Nitori waited for Nagisa's tears to gradually die down, and hesitated to go on. "Just . . . try."

Nagisa didn't respond. They resumed their staring and dropped the conversation. It was awkward, once again.

"Am I interrupting something?" A girl's voice echoed from the door. "Oniichan? Haven't you been at it long enough? I don't think Nagisa can take . . . that . . . much . . ."

The girl and two boys froze. Nothing moved. Nothing made a sound. What was already an awkward situation, transformed into the greatest embarrassment and shock any of them had ever experienced.

"What . . . oh my dear god," Gou covered her mouth in repulsion at the horrifying sight of the boys' undersides. She turned around and banged her head on the door. She glanced back to them, turned back to the door, and sprawled her arms across the entrance in a desperate hug. "Dear lord, what have I seen? What is . . ." She rotated around again and leaned back, staring wide eyed at the boys, who's faces were the same shade as the ruby lipstick on her lips.

"Okay," she let out a deep breath, "first off, where in the FUCK is my brother?"

Nitori opened his mouth to answer, but she yelled out again, "And Nitori, why the FUCK are you even in here? Rin fucked . . . BOTH OF YOU? He's dead. I swear to god that boy is DEAD. How . . . this is the most disgusting thing I've ever seen." She opened the door, ready to leave, but decided against it and slumped to the floor.

Nitori jumped off of Nagisa and dove for his clothes, throwing them on at the speed of light. "I'm so sorry Gou! Rin said he wanted me here tonight as well, he told me earlier, and so I came like he asked me to and-"

"Nitori! Just shut up, will you? Don't even talk right now! I have LITERALLY been scarred for life. THERE CAN BE NO GREATER SCARRAGE."

"Gou-chan . . ." Nagisa started cautiously.

"You too, Nagisa! Just let me think for a second . . ." She rubbed at her temples. "And Nagisa, baby, close your legs for me, will you?"

He did as she asked and sat up gingerly. "I'm sorry, Gou-chan," he breathed out.

She shook her head and rubbed at her painted eye with the heel of her palm, smearing the black makeup across the side of her face. "Yeah, I'm sorry too."

Gou continued shaking her head. Nagisa prodded at the bruises on his stomach. Nitori stood by the side of the bed, fiddling uncomfortably with his fingers.

Gou started about fifteen more sentences and exclamations which the boys raised their head to eagerly, but she never finished a single one. Her head was blistered with shock, contradictions, and distaste towards her brother.

"Um, Gou?" Nitori addressed the princess, "Do you want me to do anything for you, or . . . I don't know. Maybe I could-"

She glared at him fiercely and twitched her cheek. The corner of Nagisa's mouth curved upwards. _They really are brother and sister. _

Gou reached for the door handle and pulled herself up. She plucked Nagisa's forgotten robe off the floor, wrapped it about his shoulders and pulled him in for a hug. She laid his head down on her small breasts and stroked his hair. "I'm sorry baby. Are you alright? Did he hurt you as bad as I think?"

"No, it could have been worse," he protested.

"But your cheeks, your stomach," she gently poked at the stinging skin.

He smiled up at her. It couldn't be more fake. "I'm fine Gou-chan!"

She frowned and hugged him tighter. "Anyways," she exclaimed as she stood up, "you two need a bath. Maybe me too! Actually, that's a good idea. Let's go do that." She motioned for Nagisa to follow behind her and Nitori, but he fell to the floor, unable to hold his weight on his tired, skinny legs. They ran to his side and grabbed underneath his arms to pull him up, but he waved them off and trudged forward.

"I'm fine, guys. I promise." He beamed at their mortified faces. He limped towards the door and flung it open quickly. It slammed forcefully into the wall. He stood there, staring blankly at the development.

" . . . Nagisa?" Gou was more than worried.

"What are you waiting for, Gou-chan? Nitori? Don't be slowpokes." He staggered out the room. As he hobbled around the courtyard towards the baths, he thought he saw a dark silhouette move behind a bush from the other side of the expanse. He peered into the darkness, searching for another sign of movement, but nothing did. _I've completely lost it, haven't I?_ He giggled at his thoughts and turned the corner.

Nagisa never saw the man in the courtyard. He would never know that that same man didn't go right to the baths after he left his room, rather, had leaned against the outside of the doorway for fifteen minutes, clawing and pulling at his hair in frustration. Nagisa would never realize that there was someone else feeling the same hatred towards themselves as he was.

He would never know that Rin shed a tear that night, watching his withering dancer stumble across the garden into the ebony of the night.

* * *

**Author's note: I hope the last line reassures that this won't stay depressing forever. **


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

"Nitori, can you get me a towel?" Gou called out through the steamy clouds of the palace baths, "Nagisa's face started bleeding again! I think it's the water . . . Nagisa is it too hot for you?"

He shook his head, "No, it feels so nice Gou-chan. I never want to get out!"

She squealed, almost choking him in a tight embrace. "Nagisa you're too cute!"

"How am I cute?" he pouted and quivered his bottom lip like a small child.

Gou's eyes sparkled glitter, "So adorable! I can't handle it!" She patted the wet hair of the top of his head and spoke random gibberish into his face.

He face-palmed her cheek. "Stop it, Gou-chan . . . I'm not a baby!" he whined.

"I'm just teasing! And I may be wrong, but you're feeling better, aren't you?" She raised a thin eyebrow.

He scowled. His gaze softened and traveled south to the soapy water of the bath, feeling awful that he gave the princess such a distasteful expression. But she was right. He really was feeling better. _How can't I? Gou-chan always makes me feel better_. He didn't want to admit it though, simply because of the way she was mocking him. He was well aware of his, as Gou called it, "cute" disposition and although he was happy for such a sweet comment from the one person he could truly consider his friend at the palace, it was bittersweet.

His parents at home always said it was one of his greatest attributes. "To simply appeal to someone with only your looks is one of the greatest weapons a person can possess." They said it was just one of the many realities of the world. Nagisa hated when they told him things like that. It was completely against his nature. He never judged anyone by their looks. _Well . . . maybe not anyone_. An evil, pointy toothed grin seemed to magically appear in the water. He splashed at his delusion.

If anything, his looks were the real reason he was even in an establishment such as this. He cursed his feminine stature, his youthful face. _Momma, did you ever realize when you told me those words so long ago that I might not become a strong, manly boy after puberty? Yeah, I guess you can say I'm attractive, say it's a weapon all you want, but I'm the wrong gender for the kind of attractive people see me as. What did you think when my friends grew past me in height and in weight? Why didn't you look concerned when you saw my almost girly frame next to masculine males the same age as me? Did it ever occur to you that maybe you steered me wrong? Didn't you know what happens to boys like me? I was so naïve back then, so shallow, without a care in the world. I was a falling leaf, blowing through life mindlessly and landing wherever the wind took me. And you didn't warn me. You never said a thing. _

He couldn't blame it on his mom. After all, he came from a family of free-spirited, and dare he even think it, shallow individuals. It wasn't her fault, just the inevitable lottery that is the making of a human. All negative points aside, he couldn't deny the fact that the warmhearted girl at his side was lighting up his night. Whenever he was with Gou, he could forget about the many traumatizing experiences he shared with Rin and be purely happy again. _At least_ until the next meeting with the palace devil. It was nice having Nitori around too. He could see himself becoming good friends with the servant. Nagisa shook his head and drowned his deep thoughts into the soapy water.

"Gou-chan, I don't know how you do it, but you always make me feel better. Thank you," he smiled warmly into her compassionate eyes.

"Aw, Nagisa. You're such a sweetheart," she said as she brought him in for a close hug. "But are you sure? One hundred percent? Because you got pretty quiet for a while there."

"At least for now," he half frowned, half smiled.

Gou squinted her eyes, "I'm not sure I like that answer too much."

"But Gou-chan . . . it's hard when I know that I'll have to see certain people again."

The princess slapped a hand over Nagisa's mouth. "Shush now! Don't think about him, okay? But I guess . . . you're right. He really did take it too far this last time. Both you and Nitori . . . dear lord I think I'll be the one to kill him one day. Speaking of Nitori . . . where in the world are you?" she yelled for the servant through the hot clouds of the room. "It's kind of been three centuries since I told you to get the towel, don't you think? Nitori?"

There was a loud crashing noise and the bang of a heavy object on the tile floor. "NITORI?" Gou and Nagisa shouted in unison. They jumped out of the water without a moment's hesitation and ran towards the place the commotion had come from. The two found Nitori on the other end of the baths where there was minimal steam. He was on the floor surrounded by shards of glass, water, and flowers. His hands were clutching at his head. _Did he break a vase? _Nagisa wondered.

"No! Nitori! Did you hit your head?" Gou dived to the floor and placed his head on her thighs. The servant moaned in pain when his throbbing head came in contact with her skin. Nagisa watched, unmoving, as Gou searched through Nitori's silver hair for a wound. He was about to bend down to help out, but instantly turned to stone. His nightmares reawakened after he saw the blood on the floor. _My blood. _He stepped back when he realized his foot was much closer to a shard of glass than he liked. _No. I can't get cut. I can't get scratched. Rin's going to hurt me again! _He grabbed a towel before turning from the scene and slipped and fell his way back to the main bath. _God, I'm so stupid. That wasn't my blood! Rin wasn't there. That was just clumsy Nitori being clumsy Nitori. _He curled up in a corner by an elegant statue of a goddess and awaited his friends' return. He didn't realize how deprived of sleep he was until he nodded off.

* * *

_Isn't he beautiful, Haru? When he dances like that, framed by the setting sun and the shimmering water? It's magical, isn't it? What do you think, Rei?_

_That pool though._

_His form is off._

_Oh shut up, you two! He's like an angel. No, too sensual for that. Like a . . . fairy or a goddess or something. Haru, what's he look like to you? Rei?_

_Water. His body, his movements, they're like water. Fluid, flexible . . . free._

_I must agree. Given, that's the reason he can't have a perfect form. There isn't one._

_That's it! Nagisa! Haru, Rei, and I just agreed you look like water! When you dance, the water in the pool dances along with you. You can move everything. You can go anywhere. You can free yourself. You're free, Nagisa. And we'll be here when you find your way. Just never stop dancing. Never lose your light. We're waiting. We're here. Always. We're here . . ._


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

_Mako-chan? Are you still there? Can you hear me? Makoto?_

There was no answer. The face of the brunette boy was gone, replaced by mist. Grey, cloudy steam that occasionally speckled blue when the water of the bath reflected against it, erased all traces of Nagisa's friend. He rubbed at his tired eyes. "Just a dream . . ."

The blonde rolled his eyes upwards to the goddess statue above him. She was white, marble-textured, most likely porcelain imported from China. She was bent down, with arms extended outwards like she was reaching for his face, like she could pull him into her embrace and save him from his prison. He smiled at her lifeless, colorless face and immersed himself in her empty eyes. "Can you save me, beautiful goddess? Can you take me home?" he asked sweetly, as if his charm could somehow persuade her to break free of her stone cage and carry him home in her arms.

Faint voices slowly traveled into the room.

"Honestly, Nitori. How clumsy can you be? You're telling me you accidentally bumped into the vase and then fell backwards onto the floor? Who even does that? Did you slip?"

"No . . . I just fell. I don't know how it happened."

"You don't- oh my god. That doesn't work. You can't not know!" Gou groaned. "No wonder my brother always complains to me about how clumsy and annoying you are. But then he goes and fucks you till you can't walk. Logic? None. There's absolutely no logic in this place."

Nagisa cleared his throat.

"Oh, there you are! Where'd you go?" she asked concerned. "You left us all alone."

"Are you alright, Nagisa?" Nitori was just as worried.

Nagisa nodded, "I just got a little tired and had to sit down. I'm sorry, Nitori. I don't want you to think I didn't want to help you."

"No, no. Its fine," the servant smiled.

"I still feel bad though . . ."

"It's fine! I'm always hurting myself anyway."

"But I just walked away . . ."

"Nagisa, you weren't feeling well."

"Are you sure, because-"

"ALRIGHT! That's enough you two," Gou interjected. "Now I'm going to walk Nitori to his room and get him to bed. Nagisa, baby, wash your face and do the same, okay? Goodnight!" the princess sang as she pushed a reluctant Nitori out of the baths.

Nagisa giggled, "Goodnight!"

After his friends were gone, Nagisa focused his attention to the stagnant water. All the bubbles had popped and evaporated and the water was almost returned to its clear blue state. _Why did Gou-chan ask me to wash my face? What's wrong with my face? Oh yeah. _He touched a finger to his cheek. The blood from earlier had dried and crusted on his wounded skin.

"Rin . . ." An image of the silhouette he saw on the way to the baths seeped into his vision. "No, it couldn't have been . . ."

He peered upwards to study the porcelain goddess once again. Now, she was reaching at nothing. He almost laughed at how stupid it looked. _She's just like me. She has no one to save, and I have no one to save me. We're alone. We're nothing. Incomplete. Stuck._

Makoto's voice contradicted his thoughts, _Nagisa, you're free. Just like water. You'll find your way. Just dance. Don't stop dancing._

"Stupid," Nagisa thought. "I wish you were right, Mako-chan. I really wish . . ."

He let his head drop to the right. Then he rolled it downwards until it reached the left. He closed his eyes, opened them, and asked himself if he should really start doing this so late at night. He settled with "yes" and closed his eyes.

He rolled his head around two more times, and felt as his blonde waves caressed his forehead, neck, and ears. His shoulders gave in and began circling around in their sockets. Wrists started to circle as well as he gently raised his arms to the ceiling, where they whirled above his head like a ballerina encouraging people to dance. He spread is legs wide to drop his upper body to the floor momentarily, before raising up once again and clasping his arms around his torso. A hip crept upwards. Then the other. They swayed side to side in a fluid, liquid motion.

He imagined he was one with the pools of water at his feet. He splashed around in them and reveled in the feel of the spray on his calves. He envisioned that his body became a vessel of tiny water droplets, like a cloud. As he danced, he rained his body away, until no physical form remained. He flowed into the drains and seeped into the rare streams of the desert, until he settled at the steeps of his hometown- until all of his previous being pooled by the feet of his friends and family.

_Finally. I'm home . . ._

Nagisa continued sashaying around the baths for a good while. He knew he should be getting some sleep soon, but it was hopeless, because all he wanted to do was dance until the sun came out- to dance until he truly was at home again.

He heard footsteps around a corner, but he continued to immerse himself in his calming movements.

"Gou-chan?" he asked through closed eyes and a pirouette, "Is that you? I don't really want to go to sleep yet."

He twirled around in one last pirouette, concluding his performance with a radiant smile. He opened his eyes and searched the room. No one was there. Just the water and the goddess and his towel back by the edge of the bath.

"Gou-chan?"

There were four hallways that branched off of the bath area, including many corners and columns that jutted out into the room due to the ornate architecture. For that reason, it was difficult to pinpoint where the footsteps had come from.

"Gou-chan, you're scaring me! Can you come out?" He checked the first three hallways, but couldn't see anyone. He walked all the way to the other side of the baths were Nitori had fallen earlier. No Gou.

Nagisa rubbed his eyes and mumbled, "I really need to go to bed." He trudged back to the main bath to grab his towel before heading to his chambers. "Goodnight, worthless goddess lady. See you . . . another . . . time."

He froze. Nagisa took on the same form as the goddess. He was like stone. He couldn't move. He couldn't think. He couldn't get his eyes off the red. He couldn't advert his gaze from the blood red eyes that stared him down in the darkness of the fourth hallway. He forced every fiber of his being to take a step back. When he did so, he nearly toppled over. He expected a laugh, a chuckle, anything, but the person with the red eyes didn't move. They stayed staring, leaving Nagisa caught in their trap.

He didn't know what to do. He was terrified that if he did the wrong thing, it would be the last thing he ever did. He needed the other person the make the first move. He needed some sort of confirmation, because at this point, in this deafening silence, he was at a loss for words.

The naked blonde gulped down his fear and croaked, "Rin?"


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

Two months ago

* * *

There was a woman hanging over every part of his body. The oasis-like pool was brimming with at least eight of them. Beautiful, curvaceous, horny women competing for his charms; competing for a place in his bed for the night. They were moaning into his ears, his neck, his chest, and groping at his most sensitive parts.

"Oh Rin," one of them nibbled at his earlobe, "You're the sexiest man I've ever laid my eyes on. These muscles are simply delicious."

Another spoke into his navel, "Yes Rin, won't you take one of us to your bed tonight?"

"Rin, tell me, please, why aren't these hips thrusting into me now? I need it so bad. I need your heat deep inside of me," a third groaned, sliding teasing fingers up and down either side of his torso.

"Mm, I don't know ladies. How could I possibly fuck all of you tonight?"

"But Rin!" they cried out in protest.

He grabbed a breast of a dark haired girl and bit into the sensitive flesh of her nipple. She fell into his advance and pleaded for more. The other girls' squealed with jealousy.

The prince smirked, "I can't love you all. You'll have to fight for it."

The ripples in the water became bouncing, splashy waves as the war between the women heightened. The contest for affection had clearly reached its culmination. Servants surrounding the pool tried their hardest to keep their curious eyes off the provocative affair, knowing that if the prince caught them, they'd be severely punished.

One of these servants, a skinny teenage boy, was having a difficult time with the scene as well. But it wasn't that he _wanted_ to look, rather, he wished it wasn't happening in the first place. It broke his heart to witness such desirable women drooling over his not-so-secret affections towards the prince. After all, Rin wasn't into men. The times he ever had sex with the boy were only ever out of frustration and anger. It wasn't about pleasure with Nitori, and it never would be. So the servant never said a word, and took Rin's treatment with as much happiness as he could muster.

The palace doors flung open and slammed against the outer walls of the courtyard. Everyone in the area jumped and stared wide eyed at the disturbance. A tall, orange haired attendant who was the culprit of the incident stopped in his tracks. He scrunched up his face and sank into his shoulders, awaiting the mess of shouts and yells from the prince he was sure to receive. "Shit . . . I didn't mean to do that . . ."

Rin just stared at him and shook his head. He sighed, "You know, Seijuurou, if it was anyone else, they'd be getting beheaded right about now. But because it's you, and you're SOMEWHAT useful around here, I'll spare you. But let me tell you, it's just this once."

Seijuurou whispered under his breath, "He said that the last six hundred times . . ."

"Do you want to get fucked up the ass?"

"Oh, god no. I said thank you! Thank you so much Rin, your highness, your godliness! I'm more than grateful for your sparing! I'm honored!" he cried out as he dropped to the ground in a deep bow.

"Mhm, that's what I thought. Dumbass. So what is it? Can't you see I'm busy?"

Seijuurou blushed at the squirming women in the water, "Yeah . . . I can see that. Quite busy. Uh . . . have you seen Gou?"

"You're shitting me. You came out here to ask for my sister? Leave. Get the fuck out."

"But Rin!" the attendant whined, "I haven't seen her beautiful face all day! I need to see it!"

"Get. The fuck. Out."

Seijuurou scrambled to his feet, "Okay! Sorry, sorry! I actually have a reason I'm in here. So you know how you had me look for a new woman for you? Well . . . I kind of found one. She's from the largest market town on the other side of the desert."

Rin pushed his leeches away and waded to the edge of the pool. He made a quizzical face, "Kind of?"

"Uh . . . yeah. Could you maybe come with me?"

"No . . .?"

Seijuurou looked defeated, "But- Rin this is important! It's . . . different. And certain people in the room," he pointed to Nitori, "don't need to see this. Because I'm not sure how you're going to react."

Rin didn't even take a glance at Nitori, "Don't talk about him. I don't give a shit how he feels."

Seijuurou mouthed silently to the servant, "I'm sorry," before motioning for Rin to follow him out of the courtyard.

Rin winked at the longing girls in the pool before lifting himself over the edge. They squealed at the sight of his flexed shoulder and back muscles and the water that poured down his body as he got up to leave. As much as he liked their attention, their constant wailing was seriously beginning to piss him off, and breaking himself from their presence wasn't as difficult as it could have been. He grabbed a towel from the arms of a nearby servant, wrapped it around his waist, and strode out of the courtyard with his eager attendant. "This better be good."

Seijuurou shrugged, genuinely unsure of how this was going to play out. "Can you not get mad at me if you're unpleased with her?"

"Why wouldn't I be pleased? You know what I like."

"Eh . . . I don't know about this one."

They walked through an extensive hallway, bordered with shining gold statues and tropical plants from a faraway land known as Brazil. As was the rest of the palace, the hallways and rooms were riddled with servants, more than anyone could possible need. But Rin's father, the king, insisted on the army of helpful subjects. His voice echoed in Rin's ears: _If you're given the opportunity, if you're fortunate enough, go after whatever is thrown your way. Make use of your prosperity._

"Yeah dad, you overused it," he muttered out loud.

Seijuurou turned around, "What was that?"

He didn't answer.

They entered a dining hall on the other end of the palace. The table was long, and close to the floor. The seats were pillows- the most magnificent in the country, embroidered with imported beads and gems from across the globe. They shimmered in the morning sunlight that seeped through large windows, reflecting glowing speckles along the walls and ceiling. Rugs of the finest dyed wool and cotton were strewn across the floors, decorating the room in a multitude of colors. And in the midst of it all, stood a veiled person in the finest, glittering silks. They stared with yearning out the open windows, paying no mind to the two men who entered the room.

Rin was intrigued at how solemnly she was eyeing the barren nature beyond the room, like she was reaching for a way out- like her eyes could somehow carry her away. He could almost see the hint of a smile from what little of her face he could see. But she was small, much too skinny. And her hair, _Where's her hair? It's so short. _Her exotic appearance left him taken aback.

"Nagisa?" Seijuurou tried grabbing her attention, "This is Rin, the prince of the palace. He's the one I told you about."

_Nagisa . . .?_

She turned her head in their direction. Jewels that were sewn into the veil swished at the movement, hitting each other and tinkling like tiny bells. She was like nothing Rin had ever seen before. He was met with big, pink colored eyes that caused his heart to momentarily stop beating. They were fierce, yet innocent. They were curious, yet saddened, as if they had experienced some sort of recent hardship. He stepped closer, wanting more, yearning to understand those eyes, those eyes that locked so tightly onto his soul. _Nagisa. _He fell in love with the name in an instant.

But the girl . . . there was something off, something he couldn't identify. He wanted more than anything to uncover the secret that left him so utterly confused. He quickly grabbed underneath her arm and pulled her up off the pillow she was sitting on. She looked scared now; horrified. He touched her cheek in an effort to calm her, but she tensed up even more. He ran that same hand down her neck, along her collarbone, and traveled farther down towards her . . . _wait, what the fuck? Where are they? _

Rin stared in disbelief at the nonexistence that was her chest. There was nothing to grab onto, nothing to squeeze. "Uh, Seijuurou? You're joking right?" he called back to his attendant, "This girl's like twelve. She has no tits. What the fuck do expect me to do with a girl with no tits?"

"Yeah . . . about that . . ." Seijuurou mumbled almost inaudibly.

Only then did Rin notice the girl's shoulders were a little too broad in proportion to the rest of her body. Her arms were more defined, her waist not slim enough, and when Rin lifted the thin fabric of her shirt, what was revealed to him was the chest of a male. He poked at the flat area in wonder. _How can such a beautiful person be . . ._ He pulled down her pants _. . . a boy?_

Rin threw the boy to the ground furiously. He dove towards Seijuurou who was now shielding himself on the ground in a fetal position, and slammed his fists into his sides. He lifted the attendant off the ground by the neck and slammed him into a glass vase of ferns. The glass shattered into hundreds of miniscule pieces about the room.

"WHO THE FUCK DO YOU THINK I AM? YOU THINK I LIKE MEN? YOU THINK I'D FUCK A BOY?"

"What about Nitori? You do things to him, don't you? I know you do. I just thought- because Nagisa's pretty and all-"

Rin smashed his foot into Seijuurou's face. "Don't talk about Nitori! Don't ever say a FUCKING word about that worthless slut! Now get out. Get away from me before I break your neck."

Seijuurou stumbled to his feet and stumbled his way out of the room.

Rin didn't want to turn back to the boy. But he didn't want to leave the room either. _It's not like the kid wants to be here. _He turned around. The boy was lying out on his side with his back towards the prince. He was staring out the windows again peacefully, like he had just woken up from a tranquil slumber- like he hadn't just been thrown across the room. He had a thumb in his mouth, sucking at it diligently like a child. Rin couldn't help but wonder what was going through the boy's mind, what kind of life he was taken from, and what kind of person he was. _Yeah, that's me. I do care. I'm not as heartless and I make myself out to be._ He strode towards the lump of skinny boy, and gently nudged his calf.

"I'm sorry. I didn't, uh, mean to do that," he said while scratching his damp scalp.

No response.

Rin threw his arms in the air and started walking off. "Fine then! Be like that." _Be like what? You just knocked him to the ground, you dumbass._ Before he left the room, he took one last peep back at the blonde. He saw how slender he was, how the curve of is back led to rounded hips that were clearly incomparable with a girl's, but attractive nonetheless. And the way his pink lips sucked earnestly at his small finger was oddly arousing. He felt his towel begin to pull tighter on his body. Rin shut his eyes firmly to calm his growing excitement. _Why's he have to be so damn cute? _He really did find the boy enticing, and that's when a bubbling anger began to rise within his chest. _What the fuck. HE'S A GUY! _

"Shit . . ." he muttered before storming off. He slammed the door behind him and locked himself in his room, pulling at his hair, and clenching his teeth, and yelling at himself, and doing all the "Rin" things he did whenever he was extremely frustrated. "Fuck. There's something wrong with me, there's something wrong with me, there's something SO DAMN WRONG with me. FUCK!" he screamed as he smacked the contents off an end table and shoved a wardrobe onto the floor.

"Rin? Onii-chan?" his sister Gou called from the hallway, "Are you okay? What happened? Let me in!"

"SHUT UP GOU! Go away!" he snapped as he ripped his towel in half. "Fuck this towel!"

"Fuck a towel? Onii-chan please don't fuck towels!" she yelled back at him, nearly breaking out in laughter.

Rin opened the door for his sister, "Does it look like I'm fucking towels?"

Gou gawked at his nudity, "Oh wow Rin . . . you've grown quite a bit since we were kids. Everywhere." She flicked her eyes downwards.

He was still too flustered to make a flirtatious comment back at her. "Go get that kid in the dining hall."

"A kid?"

He slammed the door in her face.

…

It was two days later and the night was still young, with only a handful of stars stippling the nighttime sky. Rin was leaned back lazily in bed, pretending he was asleep. His sheets were draped lightly over his exhausted body and his hair was damp from sweat. He would have gotten up to shower since he loathed feeling dirty, but something was stopping him. He didn't dare to make a move. He didn't dare make a sound. Because if he did, if he turned even slightly to the right, he'd have to look down at a traumatized blonde on the floor, beaten and covered in blood. He didn't want to believe he hurt the boy as bad as he did. He was afraid to meet wide, bloodshot eyes, a shivering frame clutching at hordes of wounds, or trembling, split lips mumbling undecipherable nonsense.

Rin listened to Nagisa's weeping for the rest of the night, like he did for the last two. He didn't know that that would be the last time the boy cried in front of him. All he knew was that there was a bothersome itching at his chest that he didn't know how to pick at.

* * *

**Author's note:** I really don't like this chapter. Flashbacks are too difficult for me. How's this going?

Anyways, I want to thank my few followers and frequent reviewer (you know who you are) for even reading this. It seriously means a lot. I'm often concerned that my writing is too blunt or vulgar in comparison to other writers on here, given, I haven't read too many. I appreciate any kind of feedback because it's a big incentive to keep me going. Honestly, I would have stopped this a long time ago.

Next chapter will be up within the week!


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

_Water . . . water . . . water . . . wa . . . ter . . ._

_I can't do this. I can't go on. My tongue, it's so dry. Where'd my saliva go? It feels like sand. Darn it . . . not sand. All I can see is sand. All I've been able to see for miles on end is sand. Sand, sand, sand. _

_I need water. I need shade. I need Mako-chan. I need home. Where is home? Why am I sprawled out on this reeking camel, dying? Why are my hands tied behind my back?_

_I see orange. It's blowing in the sandy breeze. I lean my body forward to get a better view. Oh yeah . . . it's that guy from before. Before? It feels like it's been 20 years since he dragged me off my street and tied me up. _

_Orange is lifting a canteen to his lips. He turns and sees me staring through dead, moisture deprived eyes. "Sorry boy. None for you. I would, but there's barely enough even for me. You'll last." I grip the sides of the camel with my thighs and push towards him as best as I can. "Please . . . water." He shakes his head at me. I have no strength to continue asking him, so I sink down into the animal beneath me and rub my face against its foul smelling fur in an attempt to forget about it. I let myself slip away into an empty void- a dreamy expanse of sunlit nothingness. "Aw, what a cute little camel . . ."_

_Orange laughs at my unconscious utterance, "I'm sure Rin will take care of you just fine."_

_Rin . . .? What a nice name. _

…

Nagisa quickly wrapped his towel around his body and turned away from the intruder. It didn't matter if Rin had seen his exposed body countless times in the last two months, because he would never get used to it. His cheeks began to heat up with embarrassment and anger. "Go away," he managed to get out.

He continued to be met with the deafening silence of outer space.

Nagisa's shoulders gave in and started to shake, like bodies do when they cry. He whipped his head back, tears now streaming from his eyes, and screamed, "GET AWAY FROM ME! I don't want to see you! I hate you! If you're not going to say anything just leave!" He slumped to the floor and cried like he'd never cried before. The dams he'd so carefully built up were torn down in an instant. He didn't care that he was wailing like a small child in front of the one person he vowed never to cry in front of again.

Rin continued to stare blankly at the small boy as he stepped out of the hallway and into the room. He maneuvered his gaze elsewhere, and it seemed as if he forgot Nagisa was even there, sobbing loudly on the floor. At this, Nagisa's bawling ceased.

He choked, "So you're not . . . you're not going to say anything?"

Rin stopped at the edge of the bath, but didn't turn around. The blonde inched forward slightly, waiting, yearning for an answer. He wouldn't get any. His chin dropped to his chest in defeat. Streaming water drowned out the penetrating silence between them.

Nagisa was well aware that the flame within his redhead company could ignite at any minute. That was just how Rin was, unpredictable, and there was no telling when his frustration would surface. Even so, Nagisa couldn't help but voice the thoughts that he'd been burying since the first day they met. He started softly, composed, "This is why I hate you, Rin. You're a monster even when you aren't yelling or hitting me. You don't have to say a single word to show how evil you are. I don't understand when Gou-chan tells me what a good person you are, that whatever you've been doing to me isn't the real you. I can't believe her. I don't know if there's something that happened to you in the past, because she hasn't said anything, but if there is, and that's why you're like this . . . no. Forget that. I hate you." His voice drew stronger, "Can't you just let me go? Please! Let me go home! Haven't you had enough of me? All I do is make you mad! I'm not the same person I used to be, and I hate it. You're sick. You're twisted. You're disgusting . . . doing those things to me . . . I HATE IT! Say something! I CAN'T JUST SIT HERE AND ALLOW YOU HURT ME ANY MOR-"

"I lost a friend once."

Nagisa was taken aback. His eyelids blinked open and closed probably thirty-six times in that brief second. Hearing Rin's voice caused shivers to trail down his spine and goose bumps to sprout all along his arms and chest. His firm clutch on his damp towel loosened, and it dropped to the wet tiles of the floor by his legs.

"What . . .?"

Rin released a deep sigh, so deep that Nagisa wondered if he had been holding his breath the entire time. He untied his belt lazily and let it fall past his hips. His robe followed suit and slipped off his shoulders. He then balled up the white fabric and tossed it to the side. All that remained on his toned frame was a gold anklet, bangles, and extravagant necklace.

It didn't matter how much he didn't want to feel the way he did. Nagisa was mesmerized by Rin's figure. It was the same as Gou. The siblings were the most beautiful people he'd ever laid his young eyes on. It didn't matter how much he abhorred the prince in that moment, because his gaze was locked onto broad shoulders, the curve at the base of his lower back, and the way he ran careless fingers through blood-red locks. It was fascinating, hypnotic, and oddly enticing. It was almost too obscene, too fleshy; scandalous, even. Nagisa's face grew hot. He looked away and began toying with an earring. He knew if he stared for too long there would be a chance he could start to question himself, and that was the last thing he wanted to do. _I just want to get out of here. I want to go home . . ._

When Nagisa looked up, Rin was already in the water, wading around backwards with lightly closed eyelids. "So warm," he breathed out while sinking farther into the cloudy bath. The blonde stayed sitting stupidly on the ground with half dried tears.

He watched Rin bathe for the next few minutes. What else could he do? He found there was something oddly calming about watching someone lather soap into their body, pour water over dry hair and see the color turn dark at the touch of liquid. So what if you detested that person more than anything? He couldn't know how much time elapsed, how long he stayed staring at Rin, or how mindlessly his thoughts floated around in his tired head. By the time he came back to reality he was laid out on his side with his head propped up on a bent arm, still focused intently on the prince. Except now, Rin was returning that focus. _Darn it . . . how long has he been staring at me? I didn't even realize I was doing it!_

"Are you doing that on purpose?"

Nagisa sat up cautiously, "Am I doing what on purpose?"

Rin rolled his eyes and leaned back on the edge of the bath, "The way you were laying down, dumbass. People don't just stick their ass out like that unless they're asking for something."

Nagisa reached for his forgotten towel and draped it around his shoulders, "Stop talking to me."

"Then leave."

"The palace?"

Rin rubbed at his eyes. "You know what? Go ahead. Have fun finding your way home. Except, you won't. It's not even possible if you're not with someone who knows the desert. Go! Die. I don't give a shit."

"I'd rather die than be stuck here with you," Nagisa mumbled.

"Come here."

"I think I'm fine where I am . . ."

"Drop the damn towel and come over here."

The blonde couldn't argue. Rin wasn't threatening him, at least not yet.

He abandoned the wet mess of cloth and shuffled to the bath's edge. He knelt down gingerly, swung a leg, then two, into the water and immersed the rest of himself in the heat. He trudged slowly through the bath towards the awaiting male, dragging it on as long he possibly could. He didn't want to be anywhere near him, not after that night with Nitori. _I wonder what time it is . . ._ They never broke their gazes from each other. It was red on pink. Pink on red. Nagisa wished he knew what was going on in the other's head. It didn't help that he was so unsure of what was going on in his own.

Only a foot separated their bodies now. If there was a ruler between them, they would have broken it.

"Well," Nagisa whispered tentatively, "I'm here."

Rin peered down into the water by Nagisa's chest, then back up into his eyes. "I can see that." He stayed staring as he reached a finger down to the smaller boy's hip and ran his nail along the skin in circular motions. Nagisa tensed, but only briefly. Whatever acceptance that was, if you could even call it that, assured Rin to keep going. He trailed that same finger up Nagisa's side until it reached his armpit, then along his chest and collarbone. The contact was so light, barely touching, almost ticklish. The mix of steaming hot water burning his skin and the delicate, fluttery feel of a finger tracing lines across his body acquainted him with a myriad of sensations he never knew existed. He flinched when the back of a hand brushed against his wounded cheek. It lingered there for quite some time on his face. It was gentle, much too gentle for someone like Rin. There was no correlation between the same person from a few hours ago and the one who stood before him now. It definitely wasn't the same person who slapped his cheek.

The absurdity of the imbalance urged Nagisa to let out a breathy, "Why?"

The other was extremely slow to answer, "I don't know."

Rin's hand found its way to blonde curles. He ran his fingers through the waves lazily, like he did with his own a few minutes earlier. He mumbled something like, "so short," but Nagisa couldn't be sure. He watched Rin attentively as his hair was being fondled. It fascinated him how calm and serene he looked, how he was staring down at his face like he was having difficulty searching for something, like he was attempting to solve the very meaning of life. Nagisa returned that quest, and dug deeply into red spheres. His own lit up at what they saw: regular, human eyes. They were no longer blank, no longer distant, and they certainly weren't angry. _Who is this person . . .? Who am I looking at?_ When Rin swept his hand down the side of the Nagisa's face and cupped underneath his chin, he still had no idea. He granted that hand permission to push his chin upwards, and he did it without a fight.

Nagisa wanted to object more than anything, but he couldn't. His mouth opened to protest, but no sound would come. He didn't push back when Rin reached his other arm around his waist and pulled their chests together. And for some crazy reason that would forever escape him, Nagisa didn't turn away when Rin's lips caressed his own.

The prince broke contact just a few lingering moments later. That same overtly kind, almost saddened look stayed visible on his face. He took a few steps away from the blonde so they could no longer look at the other and murmured, "Go to your room."

Nagisa stepped back. He turned around and stumbled towards the edge of the bath, pulled himself out, and grabbed his towel before running out of the room. After such a long time, he was finally outside. He sucked in all the fresh air he could muster before closing himself up in his chambers. He didn't go to his bed. The farthest he made it into the room was a few steps away from the door. He tumbled to the ground, curled himself up in a ball, and shivered in his sodden towel. He didn't mind the cold, because maybe then, the warmth in his cheeks would eventually subside. It didn't seem too hopeful.

"Evil . . . he's so evil," were his last words before sleep's blanket draped over his head.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

Nagisa touched a finger to his cheek and probed at the strong new skin. _It's been a week since then . . . _

The boy was laying in his room. A gentle breeze blew in through the open windows of his chambers and kissed the exposed areas of his minimally dressed body. He spent many days like this, reveling in the magnificent bliss of the desert winds that almost covered up the blistering heat of the sunny climate. He rarely partook in any other activity other than laying on the floor. He would do it for hours, sprawled out with legs splayed apart, exposing probably the only masculine features he embodied. He would roll around and bump into furniture and laugh at himself and daydream about home, occasionally getting up to dance lazily in unison with the wind.

Today was different though, and although he was still lying out on the rugs, he didn't do much daydreaming or dancing because his thoughts were consumed with five words he'd been trying desperately not to dwell on: _"I lost a friend once."_

Nagisa was so incredibly pleased not to have been graced with the presence of Rin in the last week. Even so, he couldn't help but grow more and more interested in what lay beneath those few words that had barely managed to get out to him that day. _A friend? I wonder who. How was that an excuse for his actions? So what if he lost a friend . . . I've lost a couple friends in the past as well. How did he think that could make up for the things he's done to me? _Nagisa shook his head and began pulling and toying at his earlobe, a habit that had developed in the last few days._ I don't get him, I don't get him, I don't get him, I DON'T GET HIM! He's so evil . . . so evil . . . I know I hate him. I always will . . . I hate him, I hate him, I . . . but . . ._

Nagisa sat up slowly. He brushed two fingers across the soft flesh of his lips. _That was the first time he kissed me . . . _

In that moment, an imaginary hand seemed to run along the side of his frame, moving slowly upwards to his healed cheek to caress the milky skin. The blonde felt himself pushing back into that hand, savoring the kindness of the touch and lusting for tender lips to cover his own.

But then he fell forwards and collided face first into the floor.

"Oww. Stupid floor! Stupid Nagisa! That huuurt," he whined while rubbing at his nose. "Why do I have to be so stupid? I'm not Nitori . . ."

Nagisa was quick to cover his mouth. "Shoot . . . I didn't mean to say that," he mumbled. _Sorry Nitori._

He eased himself up from the ground and crawled to a mirror on the other end of the room. Once he reached it, he kneeled down and sat with his weight on the back of his legs like he'd seen a Japanese merchant sit in the market at his hometown. "I'll ask Rin today. That's what I'll do. What do you think?" he consulted very seriously to his reflection.

Clearly, he hadn't gotten out much in the last week.

His reflection nodded in response. Nagisa got up and brushed carpet fibers off of his legs and feet. _He'll probably yell at me or hit me or . . . who knows what else, but I need to learn about his friend. Gou-chan and Nitori told me to try and understand him, so you know what? I will! I've had a week of rest and I'm ready for anything! Will this outfit do though . . .? _

He pulled at a blue raindrop jewel that brought the two sides of his shirt together just beneath his chest. The silk fabric was light and sleeveless, hanging from his shoulders by two thin straps. Much of his chest and stomach were exposed. _I wouldn't even call this a shirt . . . it's like one of Gou-chan's bras but without the padding and some extra fabric. Wait . . . this IS Gou-chan's._

_See Rin? See what you've done to me? Now I can't even tell the difference between boy and girl clothes when I get dressed in the morning!_

His lower half was barely covered by a pair of very short shorts that clung to the top of his thighs and rear. They were of a skin colored, glittery fabric that almost blended in with his slender body, making the slight curves of his ass all the more prominent and delectable. They were far from practical or decent or even closely acceptable for one with extra parts to be wearing but in that moment, Nagisa could care less. _This'll definitely turn him off, with it all in his face and such. As long as he only see's the front . . . _

He plucked a pair of large purple studs from a box by his bed that Gou had left for him, brushed his blonde curls to the side to stick them in, and took one last glance at himself in the mirror before sashaying out of the room. He felt long strings of tiny white jewels that hung from the end of his shirt bounce and swish along his back as he went.

Nagisa danced and frolicked about the hallways and courtyard without a care in the world, earning him the many attentions of the servants of the palace. He thought he heard a girl's voice call out his name at some point, but he didn't stop to listen. It was most likely Gou, but all he cared about in the moment was dancing along to the sounds of the palace and the wind and his mind, to clear his head before his meeting with the prince. He needed to build up his subtle happiness and bravery as much as he could before its inevitable loss in the very near future.

_See Mako-chan? I'm dancing like you told me I should and everything is . . . currently everything is much better. I'm sorry that it probably won't last for much longer though, but I'm trying. Maybe if I talk to Rin . . . maybe if I clear things up and find a way out of here, I'll be able to come home to you. Please, just wait for me. I don't want you to forget._

After turning a corner into Rin's rose-filled courtyard, his pace slowed upon nearing the large doors of his room. Nagisa stopped to smell probably every bud in the quant enclosure. In his quest for the perfect sent, he began to wonder, _wait, ROSES? In the desert? How in the world . . .? _He shook his head and realized it was better not to question things he couldn't answer. This led him into thinking that the mystery of Rin would most likely never be solved, right along with the tiny red flowers harbored within the enclosed walls of this Arabian palace.

Nagisa's fingers were finally touching the cool entrance of the prince's humblest establishment. He stared long and hard at the door handle, realizing that the door wouldn't open itself, but still unable to pull it down. _Stop stalling Nagisa. You've waited it out enough. Just open the door. Just open the damn door!_

"Uh, Rin?" he choked out. "Can I um . . . I'm going to open the door now. Are you in there?"

Nagisa waited a moment. There was no answer.

"Rin . . .?" his voice cracked.

He waited a few seconds, twirling curls of blonde in a finger, and swaying his weight side to side on his feet. He put an ear to the door, heard nothing, and started lightly hitting his head on the entrance.

"Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiin?"

Nothing.

Louder now, "RIIIIIIIIIIIIN?"

There was a loud crash on the other side of the door. Nagisa cringed, but didn't jump. He just sank to the ground and curled himself into a ball. "Crap . . . he was probably sleeping . . ."

There were what seemed like ten more minutes of crashing and banging from the other side of the door that eventually died down to silence. Nagisa stayed firmly in place at the foot of the entrance with his head against the door, waiting. _Don't run away . . . don't run away . . ._

Nagisa struggled, but eventually worked up the courage to respond to Rin's inanimate outburst, ". . . is now a bad time?"

When no one answered, Nagisa stood up to leave with his head hanging low. A part of him was relieved that he didn't have to deal with Rin's fury for yet another day, but he was also disappointed that he would have to wait to learn more about his past. _I guess I'll try another day . . ._

He took a step away from the door when he heard a faint sound emanate from within the room.

"Nagisa."

The blonde's heart jumped in his chest.

"It's you, isn't it?"

Nervous fingers found an earlobe and twirled the soft flab in random motions. "Yes! It's me," Nagisa spewed out a little too enthusiastically.

"Come in. I want to see you."

Petite, naked feet somehow found their way into a place of uncertainty.

* * *

**Author's note:** Wow . . . sorry for that terribly lengthy wait! Anyways, I hope this was a good chapter and I'm looking forward to writing the rest! I want to say this'll end up being . . . hm . . . more or less 20 chapters. YEP. There's gonna be a lot more to this guys. If something is off, please let me know. Thanks for sticking with this!


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

A tiny yelp escaped Nagisa's lips. There was a pricking underneath his toe. Almost immediately, liquid began to dribble out of the tiny graze. He covered his mouth to mute his exclamation, hoping the silent body lounged across the room would do nothing more than stir. To the boy's surprise, the redhead stayed motionless and silent.

Nagisa brushed away scattered shards of glass away with the side of his now bleeding foot. He had forgotten about the first crash that hit against the door just minutes earlier when he was outside. Rin's beckoning left the blonde in a flustered state that hadn't gone down very much since he entered the room, hence, there wasn't much space reserved in his muddled head to worry about the possibility of hurting himself the second he walked in.

_Urg . . . I'm turning into Nitori. I knew I was shallow but this is just sad. I guess I'll have to add 'clumsiness' to my ever growing list of pitiful characteristics._

He cautiously eyed a turned over wardrobe, scattered trinkets and jewelry, a curtain torn from a curtain rod, other piles of broken glass, the pink, rose-looking flowers from the courtyard strewn about, and disheveled sheets along the bed and floor. _What did I even do!?_

Nagisa glanced down at a pillow to the left of him and picked it up. He brushed off miniscule beads of glass from the bottom and pulled it into his chest. _How in the world does someone get this mad? It's not rational in the slightest. I just called his name! I wonder . . . what would happen if I did it again?_

"Rin?" he mumbled tentatively.

Lying on the bed, Rin opened an eye in Nagisa's direction. He stayed staring for a lingering moment before closing it, sighing, and settling in more comfortably in his pillow. He scratched at an invisible itch on his bare stomach before opening his eyes to the ceiling.

"That's quite an outfit."

Nagisa blinked his eyes, surprised that he was answered. But his heart quickly dropped from embarrassment. He pulled Rin's pillow farther into his barely covered chest and hid his face from the nose down.

His voice muffled from the pillow, "Shut up."

"How's your cheek?"

"Why do you care?"

Rin sat up and glared at Nagisa. "Fix your attitude."

"Why?" the blonde blurted out.

Rin rubbed at his temples, clearly growing frustrated. "Do you want me to yell? Do you want me to give you the same wound on your check again? Because I will. Happily. Just let me know when you're ready."

Nagisa wasn't sure what to say then. He stayed silent and watched Rin fall back into his bed and groan. Upon noticing his undergarments and robe scattered on the floor, he eyed an extra article of fabric that was covered in a clear, barely opal colored liquid. He felt his face cringe.

_That's disgusting, leaving something so vulgar out in the open for me and anyone else who walks in to see._

But something dawned on him. Rin was the kind of person who whenever pent up, practically panicked to find someone to have sex with, whether it be him, Nitori, or one of his willing mistresses. Rin was too clean of a person and too spoiled by his family's wealth to even consider pleasuring himself. Why would he go to such lengths when he could easily call for someone to make love to?

The blonde found himself wondering out loud, "Why?"

"OH MY GOD BECAUSE YOU'RE FUCKING ANNOYING," Rin finally yelled. He struggled to kick his sheets to the side, stood up, and stomped towards the door. "What the hell am I supposed to say to you? What do you want from me? Do you want this?" he slapped the pillow out of Nagisa's grasp. "DO YOU WANT THIS?" He grabbed Nagisa by his blonde curls and pulled upwards. "IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT?"

Nagisa screamed violently from the immediate pain that shot from the base of his hair. "No! Stop it! Ahh! Please Rin, let go! My hair- I think it's going to come out! I was saying 'why' to something else!"

"SHUT YOUR DAMN MOUTH. I don't give a shit!" He then forced Nagisa around and slammed him into the door.

Nagisa was crying heavily now, "Stop it, Rin!" He cried harder and harder as Rin pushed his face more forcefully into the door. He let out an excruciating shriek when Rin's fingernails dug into his back, scratched all the way down to his rear and tore his shorts down.

"I can finally fuck this ass again. It's been much too long," he whispered roughly in Nagisa's ear while gripping slender hips with his free hand and positioning himself behind.

Nagisa panicked. In a moment, he'd be broken into and there seemed to be nothing he could do about it. He pleaded as much as he could but Rin wouldn't listen. He wriggled and squirmed but he couldn't budge. He felt a hardness against his closed opening that would soon be torn and bloodied, causing him to nearly shut down.

Suddenly, he cried out, "Is that why you did it to yourself today?"

Rin froze right before pushing in.

"You could have gotten Nitori! Or one of your mistresses! You could have easily requested one of their presence, even all of them at once! But you didn't! You stayed in here and did it yourself! Why? If you wanted to do this so badly, why didn't you get me? Why didn't you call for me?"

Nagisa couldn't turn to look at his assaulter since his head was currently pinned and immobile, so there was no way of finding out why he was being met with such a deafening silence. His loud cries softened and fell to lame sobs, and he trembled against his captive's body. His knees unlocked due to the shaking, and if it weren't for Rin holding him up, he would have slumped to the floor.

"If it's 'been much too long' then why didn't you do it with anyone? What have you been doing this whole week? Can't you just have sex with anyone if you want it? Why . . .? Why are you hurting me now? What did I ever do to you to deserve this . . .?"

Five fingers slowly uncurled from golden tendrils. Five more released their clutch on a now reddened and scratched hip. A pulsing erection drew back. And there were footsteps heading away from the door.

Nagisa, now free, fell to the floor. He sniffed and wiped snot from his face using his arm.

"Rin?"

He turned towards the prince who was now sitting hunched over on the edge of the bed, with his face in his hands. It was almost too faint to tell, but Nagisa was sure he saw Rin's shoulders barely shaking.

"Wha- what are you . . . Rin?"

"SHUT UP," he barked, "Just leave!"

Nagisa struggled to stand. Almost unconsciously, he took his first steps towards the heart of the room. _No. I won't. I won't leave. I'm going to face this. I have to. Even though . . ._ He pulled his shorts up as far as they would go _. . . even if he was about to do that._

Rin sighed, his breath shaking, "Nagisa. What don't you understand?" He burrowed his face farther into his hands before yelling out again, "GET OUT OF MY ROOM."

The blonde was hesitant in his approach, but he delved on nonetheless. It seemed as though with every step he took, after each foot of space separating them gradually came to a close, the person with blood red hair before him grew increasingly less tense. At least it seemed like it.

"Nagisa. Go."

Why he stayed, why he wasn't angry, why he was approaching someone who had murdered, resurrected, and murdered his body and soul over and over again, he didn't know. And he never would. All he knew was that there was something. He knew that this could very well be the last time he would have to put up with such a fury ever again. And now, he was in the prime position to make that come true.

Nagisa was directly above him now, staring indifferently down at a side of Rin he'd never witnessed.

"Nagisa . . ." Rin raised his head. His eyes were red- not including the irises- and much too watery. He steered his head to the left to shield a lone tear that had fallen from an eye. "Leave, Nagisa. STAY AWAY FROM ME!" his shoulders were shaking now, "Don't you know what I was about to do to you? Wasn't I just hurting you? Go! Before I do it again. What are you waiting for? GET THE FUCK OUT!"

_No._

Skinny legs bent down. Delicate fingers reached up to caress strands of red.

A fiery head pulled back. Broad shoulders turned to the side to nudge thin arms away.

_No. _

Those same scrawny arms pushed the larger body down onto the bed.

"What- what the hell do you think you're . . ."

Tiny hands pushed muscled thighs apart, gently scratching the insides from the groin to the knees.

"Nagisa?"

The boy lowered his lips to a partially hardened erection. He gently kissed the tip, then nudged his reddened cheek against it. He flicked his eyes upwards flirtatiously to meet gazes with the prince.

The boy kissed the wet tip once more. He whispered sensually, "Is this why you waited?"

Rin sat up quickly and scooted backwards farther on the bed. "Shut up and get away from me."

Nagisa crawled onto the bed to follow him. He pushed his hips upwards and arched his back. "Admit it. You want to have sex with me."

"Get out!"

"You were waiting for me."

"You don't know what you're talking about."

"I'm here now, Rin," the blonde whispered once again. He pulled his top over his head and tossed it to the side.

_This will fix everything._

Rin shook his head slowly. "Stop it."

"Do to me what you've been desperately needing." Nagisa climbed atop the man before him and straddled his waist directly above his pulsing erection.

Rin's lower body tensed.

Nagisa's lips found Rin's ear, ground his hips downwards, and moaned ever so softly against the side of his face.

"Fuck me," the blonde begged.

Rin's hands grabbed the slender hips that were rocking so erotically on his most sensitive parts. "I wasn't waiting for you. I slept with a girl or two."

"Lies."

Lips brushed against lips. The kiss was light, barely touching.

"They aren't lies. I don't want you. I would never masturbate to a boy."

"Then why are you like this?" Nagisa motioned beneath him with his hips. "You're lying. You slept with no one. You did it yourself. Because you want me."

"Shut your mouth."

"You want my ass. Only mine."

"Stop it . . ."

Nagisa reached across the bed for a small pitcher of body oil set atop the end table. He pulled his shorts down so they were around the ankle of his left leg, and proceeded to pour oil onto his fingers before feeling behind his back.

"Nagisa . . ."

He ran a finger in circles around his opening, coating it in the cool liquid. His whole body shook as he pushed it inside. Of course it would hurt. Of course it would feel strange. He hadn't used it in so long, and the last time he did, he was taken with little preparation.

Rin reached a hand up to gently brush against Nagisa's rosy cheeks. The boy's thin, flush lips were breathing out heavily and his eyes were shut tight from the awkward pain he was inflicting upon himself.

As Rin was caressing this heated skin, he realized a little too late that he couldn't bear to see such a distressed expression deranging Nagisa's harmless face. Only now, when it didn't even matter anymore, could he admit it to himself. His heart warmed, but he doused it in icy water. There was one thing he would never admit; he had fallen in love. There was no sense to it, no reason, no plausible explanation. He knew from the day he first set eyes on the boy that he felt something; that there was a strange, uncalled-for pricking in his heart. He nodded it off angrily when he realized the beautiful being before him was of the same sex, but even then, it was a brief development. Nothing could stop him from admiring the graceful beauty of the young male- his slender figure, slightly rounded curves, and sunlit eyes.

This was exactly the reason why he began hurting him. He did it out of self-pity. He did it because he couldn't bear to become something he knew he wasn't. Thus, he would lock his newfound feelings away forever. He could never again be selfish enough to impose yet another burden on the boy. He'd done enough damage already.

He would soon send Nagisa home.

But that was another matter.

At this point, the blonde struggled to press in two more fingers. He cried out softly and trembled atop Rin's motionless body. He rocked himself on his fingers, whimpering sweetly into the warm evening air. "Mm . . . I think . . . ah! Rin, I think I'm almost ready."

Tears reappeared in the tear ducts of red stained eyes. More than one spilled over the edges this time. "I'm sorry," Rin breathed out, "I'm so sorry . . ."

Nagisa answered through ragged breaths, "For what . . .?"

"Everything."

Rin reached for the submerged fingers and pulled them out. He brought them to his lips and licked them dry.

Nagisa stuck his tongue out, "That's so gross . . ."

An inane, pointy-toothed smile appeared on Rin's tear streaked face. He pulled apart the fleshy skin of Nagisa's cheeks and positioned himself against his opening.

"I'm sorry. I know I don't have the right to tell you that."

"No . . . no you don't. I hate you. That will never change."

"Then I guess I hate you too."

Their words contradicted their actions when parted lips connected in a passionate kiss. It didn't take long for the one on the bottom to prove dominant in the affair. He pushed his tongue in and grazed against the cramped entirety of the smaller one's mouth, who responded with tiny, muffled moans. He pulled his tongue out to coat the other's lips in moisture, licked them dry, and glazed them once again.

Rin began pushing Nagisa's hips down, and watched as he was slowly eased inside.

It was tight. It took much longer than usual for the blonde to grow accustomed to the warmth inside him. It didn't help that his delicate cries only heightened Rin's arousal, making the already constricting space within him grow more and more full.

Nagisa pulled up slightly, then pushed down again. He raised his hips almost completely off to rock himself on the head. He reached a hand beneath himself to steady the cock in his grasp before fucking the end repeatedly in liquid, assured thrusts. Now, Rin was casually kneading his much smaller erection in his fingers, making his ambivalent feelings easily turn to a more soothing sort of pleasure. His senses were magnified so much that taking in the length had become less of a struggle and more of a window into ecstasy.

After pulling the boy off suddenly, Rin could feel moisture dribbling onto his tip. His erection grew harder and twitched with lust. It took all his willpower not to slam the hips he grasped so tightly in his hands back onto his length.

Nagisa was now squirming uncomfortably, rocking his rear back and forth against nothing. More liquid dripped out of his underside. He labored to push downwards, but Rin wouldn't let him.

"Please, Rin," he whimpered, "Let me go back down. I need it. I need you to fill me. Please. It's so empty . . ."

Rin smiled at the blonde's flustered words and kissed his neck, "I'd forgotten how cute you are when you're horny." He licked from the collarbone to the base of his neck, right by the ear and nibbled on the edge of his jaw. It was hardly a challenge to hold Nagisa's trembling rear in his hands.

"Please Rin! I need it inside me so bad," he whined softly as his hips shook erotically against the air.

"But don't you hate me?" Rin suckled on Nagisa's neck.

"Not now . . . I can't think about that now. Rin . . ."

"Yes?"

Pink eyes widened to gaze pleadingly into red. Only then, did the prince loosen his hold on the boy's hips.

Nagisa drank in every last inch of Rin's sizeable cock and rode it like he'd never used his hips before; not even to dance. He accepted the thrusts inside his body with pleasure and met them with thrusts of his own. Their sex became lecherous.

Nagisa couldn't believe how lewd his body had become. Rin had no idea either that the boy could move his body as hot and sensually as he did now. He knew he was of a different breed, but this was completely uncalled for. His thrusts upwards became forceful, quick, and concise. He made sure that each and every time he slid into the boy's now slippery hole, he hit the most sensitive part. Nagisa cried out louder and longer with each penetrating thrust against this part of him he knew so little about. Sex had never felt this good for him. Never before had he fallen in such an ecstasy with an insatiable desire for release.

"How does it feel . . . ah! This good? It's in my butt . . . such a place . . . and I'm so full . . . and you haven't even been touching my, you know . . . but I think I'm about to- Rin, I'm- It's coming out!" Nagisa shuddered then, pushing his weight as far down as he could go, and spurted out a thin stream of come. He fell against Rin's hard, sweating chest and took the first steps in breathing himself back to a regular heartbeat.

Rin was vocal now, reveling in the feel of the tightening hole he was filling. He went on a little while longer than his partner did, before his cock couldn't hold in its accumulation of semen. He was consumed by orgasm and spilled himself deep within the blonde.

"Shit . . ." he could barely breathe out, "What the hell just happened?"

Nagisa still couldn't respond. He was too overcome with catching his breath.

Rin patted his fleshy behind, "Hey . . . are you okay?"

The boy's thighs shook as he struggled to lift his rear off of Rin's penis. It managed to slip out so he could lay back down comfortably against his chest. ". . . Fine."

The one underneath placed two fingers against the top's hole and felt for his evidence. It began to seep out onto the tips of his fingers.

"Are you not going to clean this?"

"Why don't you?"

Rin signed and ruffled his hair, "Maybe I will."

Nagisa raised his head to send Rin a confused, almost angry look before crawling off shakily and accidentally tumbling to the floor.

The one still on the bed groaned and turned on his side. "Get it the fuck together. Is that the first time you've ever made love with- . . . not love, just really intimate sex?"

The blonde brushed his dampened bangs upwards with the back of his hand. _So wet . . . gross._ He pushed the back of his earing closer into place against his ear, then began scouring the floor for Rin's robe. "I still hate you."

"You should. And you should probably leave now. I don't know how much longer I'll be able to keep calm."

The boy draped the dark robe around his shoulders, stood up, and limped to the side of the bed. He sat down and continued running his fingers through his wet hair. "Are you satisfied?" he asked rather bluntly.

Rin eyed his feminine companion. He grunted, "Aren't you?"

"I didn't come in here for that."

"Well? Are you going to tell me what, then?"

"Who was that 'friend' that you talked about in the baths?"

Rin's body stiffened. "No one. No one that matters anymore."

"But that was the first thing you said to me! That was the first- oh my god! You can't just say that!" Nagisa crawled towards Rin, "You said it like it was an excuse for everything you've done to me . . . I just want to know . . . because maybe if there's something significant about it . . . I don't know, I could never say I'd forgive you but . . . I feel like I should know."

"Fuck off. I don't want to talk about it."

Nagisa sighed, "You know, back at home, before I met you, I was so happy. I was the fun and exciting and free-spirited friend of everybody I knew. I couldn't stand when my friends were hurt or feeling down. I always tried to console them and figure out what was wrong. They relied on me for my eagerness for life and my optimism about everything. And then I came here. And I met you . . . and you did what you did and I lost it all. That's why I hate you like I do. But I'm willing to listen if you let me. I should have the right to know why you've acted the way you have around me and done what you've done. There has to be a reason I endured this abuse and rape and the fact that I will always have these scars tainting my body. I won't accept that it's 'just who you are'. No one's _just_ angry. There's a reason, and you're going to tell me."

"No rape today, my love."

The blonde could feel his cheeks heat up, "Stop it . . . besides today."

Rin smiled a little too genuinely, "You were beautiful. You still are. I can tell you liked it."

"No, no, no, no, no! Stop . . ."

Rin rolled his eyes, chuckled and stood up to leave. He went to his turned over dresser, picked up a robe that had fallen before the crash, and strode back over to the flustered boy on his bed. He bent down to kiss him atop his head, twirling a tiny curl of damp blonde in his finger before leaving for the door.

"My 'friend' isn't the only reason. One of these days, I might tell you everything. But why would it matter?" Rin looked solemn now. "Go look in a mirror. Look at your back. Pay more attention to the pain on your head. It's still there isn't it?"

Nagisa nodded. The parts of his head where Rin had pulled on his hair were still throbbing in pain. He didn't want to think about the scratches down his back from his shoulder blades to his rear. He dropped his head to his chest.

"Please, Nagisa. Remember what I did today, before the sex. Remember everything I've done to you, in as vivid detail as you can recall, and hold to those memories. I don't deserve anything from you. I shouldn't have been given what you gave me today. I'm asking you as the prince of this kingdom and you as my subject- forget this side of me that you're witnessing now."

"But-"

"I don't even know what I am anymore."

And with one last dismal glance, Rin strode out of the room.

Quivering lips whispered to themselves, "Trust me, I don't know either. . ."

* * *

**Author's Note: **THOUGHTS? COMMENTS? QUESTIONS? CONCERNS? Sorry about how long it was. That's the most extensive piece of writing I've done in such a short amount of time. Writing that proabably-lame-and-stupid-attempt at a proper sex scene was insanely draining.

Oh, and just btw, I really love reviews :) wink wink, nudge nudge


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